Three Things That Helped Me Prepare for my Cancer Journey

“Prepare for my cancer journey.” Really?? You may think that I am crazy and that this is not for you. But wait, let me explain . . .

I have always been a planner. Not necessarily a daily/weekly/monthly type planner. I have always been more fluid in those areas. No, what I am talking about is being a disaster planner. I lived for almost four decades in Florida. If you know anything about Florida, you know that they get hurricanes and boy have I been through my share of hurricanes. What hurricane prep taught me is that while you cannot prevent the storm, you can lessen the impact of the damage with preparation. Prepare for the worst, control what you can, and let go of the rest. That was my motto. And then along came cancer . . .

My cancer journey started in September of 2021 when I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I was told that I had a mass on my ovaries that was “highly suspicious of ovarian cancer.” Even so, I was told that it was probably not cancer. So while I prepared for post-surgery recovery, I did not prepare for post-surgery complications or a cancer diagnosis. Maybe it was denial or overwhelm, but even though there was a part of me that expected a cancer diagnosis, I did not “prepare” myself for a cancer diagnosis, as if anyone could truly “prepare” themselves for cancer. Even so, I was able to prepare for my after cancer treatment.

I focused on whaat I could do to prepare myself for, or at least lesson the challenges that other cancer patients and survivors were experiencing.

First, let me clarify that my preparation for hurricanes did not involve mental preparation, it was all practical, physical, environmental preparation, so that is where I started when I received my cancer diagnosis. I relied on my strength of disaster planning and started thinking about how I could take that skill and apply it to my cancer journey. I focused on what I could do to prepare myself for, or at least lesson the challenges, that other cancer patients and survivors were experiencing.

Even though I hate to ask for help, I knew I would need help to get through.

So I asked.

The first thing I did when I learned that I might have cancer was let my core support system know. Who are your core support people? These are the people that you would choose to be there with you during a crisis. The people that you know in your heart that if you had to lean on someone, you would want it to be them.

Now, we don’t always know who will actually be there for us and who will let us down. Fellow journeyers and I will tell you that the cancer journey brings along with it disappointment and anger. Disappointment in the people that, for whatever reason, by choice, by uncertainty of what to do, or by not really being your people, are not there for you. But the thing is, during this tie of crisis, and a cancer diagnosis is a time of crisis, you need to find out who your core group is. Because you are going to lean on them. A lot. And they are going to be a big part of the reason you get through. Even though I hate to ask for help, I knew I would need help to get through. So I asked.

I was lucky. I had a core group of people that I initially told about my diagnosis. And these people were there for me. From check-ins, to texts, to flowers, to thinking of you surprises, to lifing me up on my down days, and to reminding me that I was loved, they were there for me.

Unfortunately, I would soon find out that a close friend was going on the exact same journey with me and became part of my core support group in a different way. A common understanding through the bond of being a fellow cancer survivor. We provided each other the same kind support that my other core group provided, but it was with a knowing, as we were going through the exact same thing at the exact same time.

Who are those core support people for you? It could be a community or it could be just one person. It doesn’t matter, what matters is that you have support. While this is true during treatment, I will tell you that it’s equally true during the after cancer. I encourage you to reach out, be vulnerable, and tell them that this is the time that you need them. Because you do. Do it even if you are not sure of exactly what you need.

For me, having nutritious foods in the freezer gave me peace of mind.

Diet seemed to me to be an important factor in my recovery and for symptom management before and after treatment. Let’s face it, food for many of us equals comfort. My body was extremely weak from surgery, from cancer, from the blood clots that I developed after surgery, and later from the treatment itself. My three day hospital stay ended up being seven days, and by the time I was discharged I could barely walk 100 feet. I knew I needed to do something to boost my immune system and help my body heal and get strong.

The book, “The Cancer Fighting Kitchen” by Rebecca Katz became an invaluable resource to me. I made a list of nourishing and nutritious recipes, foods that receive common symptoms like nausea, constipation, low appetite, and fatigue and sent my husband off to the grocery store to stock up. My husband is my rock, and while he will cook for me if I ask, it is not something he enjoys. It stresses him out. So as soon as I was feeling a little stronger (by moving a few more steps each day, resting when I needed to, and eating small portions of nutrient-rich food), I started cooking.

I made nutritious soups, some light in case I was nauseous and unable to eat, and some robust and nourishing in case I had a good appetite. Mineral broth was my mainstay before and after treatment. I still use it today to boost my immune system when I feel I may get rundown and prone to illness or when I am feeling ill. I made energy bars for snacks, and fruit compote to help if it was constipated (an all too common symptom of both chemo and pain medication). I had ginger - cookies, chews and raw ginger for tea. I still rely on ginger when the nausea creeps in. I stocked up the freezer so that on those days that were really bad there was health and nutritious food for me to eat. I had six rounds of chemo and in between those rounds on the days when the chemo symptoms were residing, I would slowly restock the freezer. For me, having those foods in the freezer gave me peace of mind.

What food brings you comfort and nourishes you? If you are newly diagnosed I encourage you to stock up your freezer if you can, or get that support person to help you get prepared so that you have the nourishment you need to help you heal. If you are in the after cancer phase of your journey like me and still get those post treatment flares, having meals in the freezer helps make those still difficult days easier. If you can’t do it yourself or don’t have a support person that can help, there are mail order meal services you can order so that there are nutritious smoothies, soups and meals on hand. I used Splendid Spoon to supplement the times when I was too weak to cook and still wanted the freezer stocked.

What did I need to feel physically comforted?

Donna and Grayson, her comfort bestie for those rough days!

I had my support system in place, food ready to nourish my body and soul, but what about those creature comforts? What did I need to feel physically comforted? My daughter sent me a tummy pillow to help me after surgery. It was soft, cheery and bright yellow, and I could hold it against my stomach to provide some support and to protect my incision from my seat belt. I slept with it and also used it as a buffer between me and my little fur babies. There are pillows available for different types of surgery including port protection from seat belts. Etsy has a great selection and you can even choose a pattern or fabric that speaks to your own unique personality.

One of my friends sent me a care package after surgery that included comfy pajamas, soft socks and a fleece throw blanket. The blanket was teal, the color representing ovarian cancer, and it had words of encouragement and inspiration on it. I took it to every chemo appointment and still treasure it to this day. A reminder of hope. A reminder I am loved.

I made sure that I had comfy clothes to recover in. I knew there were most likely bad days ahead, but I didn’t want to stay in my pajamas every day. I wanted to be as “normal” during those bad days as possible. So I made sure I had a few cozy lounge pants and tops. There are many affordable options out there. Or you may have a favorite set of leggings or a t-short that brings you comfort. I made sure that the clothes I wore to treatment were comfortable but also looked good which helped me with my body image and self esteem.

Promise that you won’t laugh at this one. It’s common for us to purchase stuffed animals to comfort children. Firefighters and Law Enforcement sometimes carry teddy bears to give to children for support. So why is a stuffed animal just for children? I was a stuffed animal junkie as a child so I wanted one to comfort me now as an adult. I purchased a giant stuffed animal for myself through Lavender Life Company and named him Grayson. He was filled with a lavender pouch that could be named and inserted to use as aromatherapy. Lavender is said to be known to reduce anxiety and stress, and to help with insomnia. I didn’t use Grayson too often, but when I took him out and snuggled with him in bed my husband knew it was a really bad day. Soft, cuddly, with a heavenly smell, Grayson provided the perfect comfort. As an added bonus, for every stuffed animal you purchase from Lavender Life Company a stuffed animal is donated to a child in foster care!

What brings you comfort? Is it soft clothes, a nice blanket, a special pillow, a stuffed animal? Maybe it’s even a playlist and a candle. A cup of tea. Treat yourself and use it on those days during treatment and after cancer when you need a little boost. It may make your day a little brighter.

Preparation helps mitigate the bad days and brings you some comfort.

Preparation is not the “be all, end all” to make your cancer journey carefree. But by having your support system in place, foods to nourish your soul and body, and the things that bring you comfort nearby, you can at least mitigate those bad days a little and bring yourself some comfort. These aren’t just for when you are going through treatment. After cancer people can also benefit. If you haven’t gotten your support system together it is never too late. Research shows that a good support system improves symptoms of depression and anxiety. If you are like me and getting post-treatment maintenance care, or if you have late or lingering side effects from treatment, having foods that nourish and comfort you at the ready will make those fatigue and side effect filled days easier. Couldn’t we all benefit from a little cozy comfort waiting for us when we needed it?

Which of these preparations will you implement to prepare for your cancer journey? What are your strengths that you can use to make YOUR cancer journey a little easier? Let me know!